perfectionism
is considered a social tendency and we should know that we are social by nature. Being complete leads to people controlling your life, and because a person by nature loves to control and dominate others, you are trying to make yourself complete, allowing many people to control your personal life, and this is a mistake in your right and in their right because your lifestyle is one of your personal responsibilities. The media and promotion also urge us to be perfect. I will give you some examples of this:
• We have an 80% discount on this product Buy it now before the discount period ends
• Someone bought a private helicopter today to drive him to work
• The actors made $2 million from one of his works.
It leads us to frustration and unhappiness and makes us feel that we do not accept ourselves if we do not buy that product or that Lamborghini. Do not be miserable and lack self-esteem.
Is perfectionism a mistake?:
Perfectionism is considered a mistake because it allows others to manage our affairs under the threat of non-acceptance or rejection, and thus we lose a large part of ourselves and it becomes impossible for us to enter into honest relationships. Here are some examples of perfectionism: In keeping your image intact in front of others When you are not ready to do what others expect of you (but you still do) When perfectionism causes you to set wrong standards for yourself When you give up your progress to please others When you waste your time and money pleasing others instead From spending it on achieving your true priorities When you turn to alcohol to cover up your feelings of inadequacy When your relentless pursuit of perfection is destroying your emotional and physical health. To please others. But accept the idea that perfectionism is wrong is not enough. You also have to choose not to do it again. These two steps are your way to freedom from perfectionism 1) Accept the idea that perfectionism is wrong 2) Choose not to do it again. anyone can help You are in this tendency because it is between you and yourself to set appropriate standards and act in a way that satisfies yourself.
The alternative solution to pleasing people:
If you are resolved to give up trying to reach perfection, you must now find another way to manage your life. You must understand that you will not be able to move from pleasing others to pleasing yourself suddenly. To perfectionism by liberating yourself and showing your best qualities. Such freedom is based on sound and changeable social values other than the values you learned from your tendency towards perfectionism or from your childhood stage, and these values help a person make conscious decisions towards his new life.
1.The psychology of interdependence: When we were young we depended on the world in general and our parents in particular for almost everything. And sometimes on himself, and this behavior leads to psychological safety and self-respect. Your self as a self-reliant individual who bears the responsibility for his livelihood and is always aware of what others can contribute to you.
2.The moral principle of public interest: This principle is based on a positive contradiction. It is one of those clear and important contradictions that we discover its reality and this paradox says: Live To serve what is good for everyone rather than your personal interests alone. For example, if you spend time working with a group that serves the environment in your community to reduce industrial pollution, you will not only find a safe and healthy place, but you will also enjoy a feeling of deep satisfaction in cooperation with others. And so when you live By this principle, you do not always strive to meet the standards of others and then berate yourself if you cannot meet them. Instead, as a contributor to the greater human community, you are setting yourself acceptable expectations and mutable standards.
Accept your imperfections:
Suppose you are known to be accepted by others, but in order to experience the freedom that I spoke of, it is important to know that you are still imperfect and that it is a good thing that you are. We are happy because frankness and honesty take precedence over others. If you try all the time to be perfect, those you try to influence will turn away from you. I know that trying to show your flaws in front of others is difficult, even very difficult, but try to do it in front of one person dear to you. Try or show him that you I am not perfect and the values of honesty and frankness take precedence over perfection.